How God answers prayer

Jesus taught that God hears and answers our prayers because he cares for us. But how does God answer prayer? In other words, how do we know when he is answering? Does he always answer in the way we expect?

Jesus’ promise to his disciples was simple:

If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.  (Matthew 21:22)

But how is his promise to be understood? Some people take this to be God’s only teaching regarding prayer, meaning he will give us anything we want without limit. The problem with this is demonstrated by the following true story.

A young woman had come to faith in Christ and was baptized. She was growing in her faith and also in her career path, graduating with an advanced degree. A position in her field opened up in a large city which she considered her ideal job. She prayed fervently that she would be accepted, but after the application and interview process was over, she didn’t get the job. This sent her into a state of disillusionment and as a result she stopped praying and dropped away from fellowship. What was wrong? Was it her prayer? Or did God not hear her? Could she have prayed differently? Or were her expectations of God wrong?

Ways in which God answers prayer

Jesus taught us to pray always, and never give up hope (Luke 18:1). He also taught his disciples how to pray. But how do we discern God’s answer?

Miraculous intervention and deliverance 

Sometimes, God in his mercy provides for our need or delivers us from our problem through miraculous intervention. In difficult situations when we need God’s help, he is there to grant it. There have been countless times in my life when God sovereignly intervened to delivery me from pain, illness, danger, and even possible death.

This is without question the kind of answer we prefer. A miraculous answer is easiest for us, as it requires no effort on our part. But if we’re honest and look at all the prayers we have prayed, this doesn’t come often. I firmly believe God still performs miracles today. But God never promises to provide a miracle on every occasion whenever we ask. And we should never expect it as a given.

He does however promise all believers a final deliverance from pain and suffering. But this is in the future, at the resurrection.

Taking us through trials and tribulation

This comes as unwelcome news for many, but God does not promise to remove all trials and difficulties from our lives. Instead of removing them, many times God will take us through them.

This is the answer we want the least, because it involves suffering. We prefer that God would just deliver us completely. But his goal for us is spiritual and personal growth, to become more like Christ. This is better for us, as the result is a stronger faith and is more permanent. Even Jesus learned obedience by his suffering:

Son though he was, he learned obedience from what he suffered and, once made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him… (Hebrews 5:8-9)

Not that Jesus was ever disobedient, but even he grew in perseverance and steadfastness. God wants prayer to be the means to a deeper relationship with him, not just a machine to give us anything and everything we want. And this means trusting him through life’s trials.

Answering prayer by granting wisdom

In many cases God answers prayer by granting us wisdom to make good decisions.

 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord.  (James 1:5-7)

Confidently make your request known to God, but also pray with wisdom and in line with what you know to be God’s will. And if you lack wisdom as to what his will is, then ask.

Answering prayer by guiding us

Often when we pray about a people-related problem or situation, God answers our prayer by guiding or leading us. Sometimes we ask God to do something for us and he gives his answer by leading us to do it. And as God leads us, we enter into his work and become part of the answer.

For example, we might just be the catalyst that is needed to calm a chaotic situation or provide blessing where there is despair. Or it could be a particularly difficult problem and God leads us to an answer that we hadn’t considered before.

Or we might find ourselves praying for a particular person experiencing pain or hopelessness. And then God leads us to that person to be the comfort or help they need. We pray for someone’s healing and then we become the one who applies God’s healing balm.

God invites us to participate in his work. By leading and guiding us God gives us experience in serving, obeying, and mentoring others in the same path. We become part of the answer, and the answer becomes a part of us through the experience we gain. This builds our knowledge, faith, and character, and also builds the kingdom of God.

Delayed response

Many people interpret Jesus’ promise in Matthew 21:22 to mean that God answers prayer immediately. On the surface, it’s what that verse could imply. But in most cases, God doesn’t answer prayer within our timeframe.

Although God hears every prayer we utter, he never promises to answer immediately. Of course, it’s not wrong to ask God to bring help quickly, especially when we’re in a really tight spot. But most of his answers will be delayed according to our schedule. Having been a believer in Christ for over 50 years, God has answered many prayers. But the vast majority of these were not answered immediately.

Just because we’ve prayed about something doesn’t mean we are guaranteed to have God’s answer at our fingertips. This is a gross presumption on our part and can lead to a prideful attitude and false hopes. It can also lead to misreading God’s answers—we will then interpret the most significant thing that happens within our artificial timeframe as God’s voice.

Persistence with patience

We know that God is very patient with us in responding to his call and growing in faith. We all appreciate that about God. But in the same way, we should be patient with him, as his timing is rarely on our schedule. How we pray shows our level of spiritual maturity, as patience with God is a sign of maturity and true faith. Conversely, always expecting an immediate answer shows immaturity and also lack of faith. In Psalm 40, David tells the story of how God answered his prayer when he was being attacked by cruel adversaries:

I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. (Psalm 40:1-2)

In Luke 18: 1-8 Jesus told his disciples the parable of the persistent widow to show them they should always pray and not give up on God. His lesson in this parable was persistence, and that because God is just and also faithful, and we shouldn’t despair when the answer hasn’t come yet.  So, persistence with patience is the best approach for prayer.

When God’s answer is no

Of course, the most disappointing of all is when God answers prayer with a definite “No.”  When all other answers are exhausted and his obvious response is “No,” then we need to humbly accept it and move on. The coveted job was denied, the one we loved rejected us, the dream house we wanted was sold to someone else, or the gravely ill person we prayed for passed away. But in all of life’s disappointments, we can trust God’s answers are the best.

There are many things that God will do because we pray, but there are some things that God will never do no matter how hard we pray. They are simply not in his will or plan.

Misguided expectations and practices

False expectations of God and misguided practices can cause havoc in our lives and faith. Here are the more common ones.

Assuming we know God’s will

Probably the most common mistake we make in prayer is assuming we already know God’s will. We are sure God wants us to have this job we applied for. Or we are sure God wants us to marry a person we’re in love with. We are sure God wants us to have some specific material blessing such as a certain house or car. So, we pray, assuming that God agrees with us.

It’s very safe to pray for things that God has promised in Scripture. But it’s a gamble to believe God for specific things he has not promised. We believe him for salvation, but we can’t expect a dream job, a large house, perfectly good health, flawless children, or a perfect marriage with the person of our choice. He has promised to provide for our basic needs, but we shouldn’t demand specific material blessings from him. We can always ask for something specific, but we should never assume it to be his will. This will set us up for disillusionment, like the woman in our story. Our prayers need to be in line with God’s will:

This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.  (1 John 5:14-15)

Always expecting a miracle

We all would like for God to perform miracles to deliver us from our problems. And when God does this for us, we should rejoice. Sometimes that’s what we need if we’re really in a tight spot, or in danger.

But some of us get in the habit of expecting a miracle for everything. Many people read the Bible stories of miraculous deliverance of God’s people and assume that should happen for them every time they pray. But if our prayers are focused this way, we again set ourselves up for disappointment. God does command us to pray for his guidance and deliverance. But above all else, he wants us to grow in faith, knowledge, and wisdom.

Praying in Jesus’ name

Jesus promised that if we ask anything in his name, he will grant it:

You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.  (John 14:14)

But some people put the phrase “in Jesus’ name” at the end of their prayers, believing it’s a sure way of receiving what they ask. What Jesus’ promise really means is that our faith in him is the basis of our relationship with God, and we should come with our requests before the Father through him. But saying “in the name of Jesus” does not automatically make our request God’s will.

Impressions

A practice among some Christians is to rely on thoughts and mental impressions to discern God’s answer to prayer. Some even rely on the first impression that comes to their mind after praying. Can God reveal his will to us by impressions? Yes, of course. There have been occasions when God seemed to answer my prayer in this way.

But God has never promised to answer prayer in this way and there are no good examples of this in Scripture. It’s just not wise to rely on this as our main means of discerning God’s answer. The mind is very susceptible to deception, and the devil knows this well. How do we discern if an impression is from God or not? By consulting Scripture and godly wisdom.

Casting Lots

We find stories in the Bible when God’s will was determined by asking for a sign or casting lots (what we call gambling). The apostles chose a replacement for Judas this way (Acts 1:15-26).

I once heard a sermon on how casting lots to determine God’s will is biblical. The speaker cited the examples in Scripture when that was done. Although these were historical events recorded in the Bible, there is never any explanation of why this method was chosen. The truth is that the ancients practiced this frequently. It was a cultural practice and God accommodated it because the people needed and expected an answer.

Can God answer prayer in this way? No doubt. But is it wise to cast lots to know God’s will? No, because he never commanded anyone to do this. And it’s very unwise to formulate doctrine from biblical history. Many other practices such as stoning of criminals are found in biblical history, but we definitely don’t and can’t do them today.

Already having the answer

In many cases, people pray about things for which the answer has already been given. Should I steal from someone if I need money? No, we already have the answer to that in the Ten Commandments. Should a Christian marry a non-believer? No, this is second-guessing God because his answer is already provided in Scripture. Should I pray for God’s protection just before doing something dangerous and foolish? No, this is called tempting God.

Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. (Galatians 6:7)

So, let’s not deceive ourselves—there are many cases when God has already provided the answer. It’s self-deceiving to pray for things that are expressly forbidden in Scripture.

God’s goodness in answering prayer

The underlying truth behind God’s promise to answer prayer is that he is good. His ways are best, and we can trust him to give us what is good for us, just as Jesus taught:

If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!  (Matthew 7:11)

So, how does God answer our prayers? God answers prayer in his time and in his way, and he gives us what we need and not just what we want. We know we can expect great things from God, but they might not always be packaged and delivered to us in ways we want or expect.

So, take Jesus at his word, and pray with confidence, but pray also with humility and according to his will. In the midst of such uncertainty and chaos in the world, we can trust God to give us good gifts and provide for our needs, because he cares for us.

… the Lord longs to be gracious to you; therefore he will rise up to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him!   (Isaiah 30:18)

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